Excerpts from AI-Written Rom-Coms That Prove Human Writers Are Obsolete

Martti Nelson, Lady Author
2 min readMay 10, 2023

I have my very first piece in McSweeney’s Internet Tendency!

To support the striking writers of the #WGA, I have…I mean the AI has…written some truly, um, “magical” rom-com moments.


Broman Holiday

WILLY (gasping): You are an undercover prince?

The hospital lights glow brightly so that nobody cuts into the wrong person anymore.

PRINCE PETER (nodding his chin, which resembles a butt): I am the undercover prince for all of Brotopia.

He takes a golden cape out of his man-satchel and swings it around his shoulders.

WILLY: Wow. That is a cape.

PRINCE PETER: I own 176 capes — one for every day of the year.

The hospital lights began to buzz in their own language. Willy gets down on one of his two knees.

WILLY: But how can an undercover prince love me, a child surgeon who saves countless adorable lives?

Willy pounds the ground, which is tile, so the pounding isn’t a very good idea.

PRINCE PETER (looking deeply into Willy’s twirling eyes): We will be equals once I am a child surgeon, too. Hand me the knife.

The two sweethearts live happily ever after and cut open a little girl, who was sick with bleeding.

The hospital lights looked from high above. That little girl was their daughter.

READ MORE HERE! I wouldn’t mind if you shared it and stuff. And support the WGA, they are doing Din Grogu’s work!



Martti Nelson, Lady Author

Beautiful, but doesn’t know it. Humor, parody, satire author. ATTACK OF THE ROM-COM out now! marttinelson.com | She/Hers